Spook Wispy, Like Smoke

I want so much to believe
what I do matters.
I want so much to believe this,
that I create countless ideologies
that bind and hold me;
that keep me miserably dependent
on mythical characters
and illusional themes.

Every action I take
I take to maintain
the idea of my continuity;
to sustain the belief of my solidity.

But, I'm neither solid
nor continuous.
I'm spook wispy, like smoke.
I'm temporary,
here for as long as I last
and then nothing will be left
of what I now see
as so very important.